Helping Women Escape Sex Trafficking

National research shows 90 percent of women in the industry were sexually abused as children. The average age that women begin to work in prostitution is 13 years old. While each woman in our program – we call them protégés – has a unique story, there are common threads. Single moms with literal or no support systems, childhood sexually abuse, family violence, teen pregnancy, other traumatic experiences, women who want better lives for their children but lack the tools and the skills to provide a safe and nurturing environment.”

Well, that’s an interesting introduction to New Friends New Life. It’s – the little logo here or motto is, “Transforming the lives of women and their children.” And Katie, how long have you been involved with New Friends New Life, and how in the world do you get involved with something like this?

And so –

So I just kind of started learning, and the more I learned, the more I realized that young girls were being trafficked. And then I heard of a ministry called Alert, and they go into juvenile detention where a lot of girls who are actually trafficked are arrested as prostitutes, and they wind up in detention. And the juvenile justice system is intended to rehabilitate, not to punish, and they want Christian groups to come in and talk to the people that are there – the girls and boys.

So we have a ministry with the girls, and we find out a lot of kids don’t even realize that they’re trafficked. They have a boyfriend who is actually a pimp, and they are arrested for prostitution or they’ve been trafficked and didn’t realize it. And so, we are able to share with them – we do a life skills class, and it’s great. The girls are awesome, and just – we love them and they love us, and it’s been a blessing. So –

And then 82 percent of the women we help have children of their own, and on average, two children. So we have a full-fledged children’s program so that we’re working with them on their mental health and –

But then, as they start going to school and they get older, they realize, “I am different. This isn’t happening to every little girl that’s around me,” and then they wanna escape that. Well, that’s when we get the runaways or the throwaways in our cities. So that’s why, when you say the average age is 13, that’s they age they wanna run – they wanna escape that abuse in their home, and so that’s where we’re targeting them. I love the ministry that Alert does and putting volunteers in to really mentor them and to care for them. And then for New Friends New Life to bring in the licensed professional counselors who really work therapeutically to restore from that sexual abuse is key.

And this is her own words: “My turning point came when I was driving to work again, and I just pulled over and asked God to help me and save me from this life. I was exhausted being someone I wasn’t meant to be. I wanted to be who I dreamed of as a little girl. I wanted to be a better mother for my boys. I wanted to make them proud. I was disgusted with myself and hated who I was,” and then it talks about being introduced to the ministry, and feeling liberated, etc. That’s not an unusual story, is it?

And that comes through knowing God and knowing Jesus and his plan and purpose for their lives, but it also comes in very practical ways, as you said earlier. It comes through education, job training, learning how to get employment, maintain employment, learning how to be a good parent to your children: there is hope outside of that, and that’s the message that we want to give.

Pimps look for runaways and throwaways, which are kids that are kind of forced out of their homes or they’re not wanted. So that’s how we meet them. It – a lot of them, too, go into foster care and they’ll run from foster care systems, because a lot of the foster care systems, especially for girls who have been incarcerated – one girl who had no where to go, she said, “I don’t wanna go into foster care. The only people that take girls like us are the people that are doing it for the money, and I’ll run. I swear I’ll run.” So then they’re just prey on the streets if they do that, so –

And because of that, I do it for you. I’m an agent of His transformation. That’s why I’m here. That’s why we’re able to help you with your rent, or give you a grocery card, or do the different things you need to get out and stay out, is because there is love, and there is respect, and there is value. And it only comes and flows through His love for me, and that flows to you.” And it’s just the most – I’m a preacher’s kid, so I grew up – I have two strikes: I’m an attorney and a preacher’s kid.

Now, our program is 100 percent self-select, so we have no part of our program that’s court mandated, or – we just have found that that’s not really the best use of our resources. But we do reach out with law enforcement, to judges, to other social service agencies through our media – lots of different areas where we can, with other partners that we’re working with in the city, to say, “Here’s our resource. Here we are in Lewis Darret Jail just to tell you what’s available to you when you get out,” and do some outreach like that.

But the number one key is that they have to make that choice, and they have to make the phone call or go online. Our website’s newfriendsnewlife.org, and we get e-mails on a daily basis that says, “I want help. I think it’s time. What do I do?” And so we can, once they make that choice and once they take that step, we’ve got a 16-year plan that we have really worked to get best practices to help a woman transform her life, but she has to ultimately make that choice and take that step.

And so, for us, a key part in our children’s program is to show them what good men look like, and that’s a unique way to volunteer, is to come and play basketball, or come and serve food, or come and help with homework. But to show these young boys what a good man talks like, acts like, looks like; that he doesn’t raise his voice; that he doesn’t hit his mom; he doesn’t disrespect women. And so that’s a really important program, because this is really the only avenue that they may have that opportunity to see.

This coming year we’re gonna have Sally Field come and speak about women and what that meant in Hollywood, but what it also means in our community. And then we also have a golf tournament where men and women can get together and in a fun afternoon raise some much needed support, but also hear about the mission and why it’s important. And then what’s just coming up in December is a holiday home tour, which – we have four amazing homes in Highland Park and Preston Hollow that – again, ticket holders can come and see the architecture, but always hearing about the mission and hearing why it’s important.

In all of our events, we talk about a pledge that we ask our supporters to make, and that’s a pledge to not buy a commercial sex act and to tell people why you pledge not to do that. And we think it’s really important in our community not just to volunteer and support financially, but also really make that commitment that I’m not going to go to that club, and I’m not going to go to the brothel, and I’m not going to go online and buy that young girl; and I’m gonna tell my peers, and my friends, and my coworkers why I’m not doing that.

I’m not doing that because she was an abused girl and this is abuse and trauma for her, and it’s not just. And it’s a modern-day form of slavery, and it preys on the most vulnerable, and it’s the young girls. And so we ask everyone that we meet to make that pledge and to tell people why you’re doing that.